Does sex has been a problem in your marriage? Often, sex frequency is a major sex issue in a marriage. There are times that women are insensitive and could not understand the frequent need of men for sex, vis-a-vis to women. But there are also instances when a woman wants more sex but he doesn’t want to do it. When this happens, the partners are creating space between them. Refusing often leads to emotional hurt and stress. Doubts and speculations push them away from each other, physically and emotionally.
When this happens to you, should you give up your marriage? The answer is no. Giving up your marriage is not an option as long as you love each other. There are so many ways on how you can handle this situation.
Keep calm and respect your partner.
It really hurts if your partner refuses you, but before nagging, calm yourself and hear your partner’s side. Your partner maybe tired from work, needs some sound sleep, not feeling well, body’s aching, or mentally stressed. You may not know it, but stress and busy lifestyle affects your partner’s sexual drive. Start by taking care of your partner. Give him/her foods that are best for their body and have positive effects on their libido like nuts, proteins, green leafy vegetables, and many more.
Do not have a routine sex.
Do not mark your calendar as to when you should have sex. If this happens, your partner will not be sexually driven because he/she already knows what you are going to do. Sex should come in an unexpected moment. Control yourself as much as you can until your partner initiate for it. If you cannot really control it, you can satisfy yourself using your own hands and sex toys. Next time you’ll have sex, it will be satisfying.
Do not criticize your partner.
Criticizing your partner for his/her sex performance will not help at all. If you criticize him/her, he/she will lose the confidence on bed. Accept the fact that not all sex are satisfying, there are lousy times too. You should also know what the capacity of your partner on bed is and try to respect that. Do not expect too much. Instead of criticizing your partner because you are not sexually satisfied, remember that you make love with him/her out of love and not out of desire.
Do not over-think the rejection.
When your partner says “no”, take it as a one-time thing. Do not bring the issue everyday because your partner has a reason why the answer is no. Do not believe that your partner is cheating on you, you are not good on bed, or he/she is done with you. Reduce your anger and smile the next day because you still have many days to spend the nights together, just not today.
Sometimes your partner is rejecting you because you are not putting an effort to be seductive. Be creative and do things you have never been done before like preparing for a romantic night, wearing sexy lingerie, buying new sex toys, etc. Do things that will drive up your partner’s sexual desire once more if this is one of your bed issues. You can also introduce new sex positions, something they never know exists.